Star vs. Rosie vs. Barbara

Let me see if I can summarize all the hype surrounding the View recently.

-Star Jones Reynolds lost A LOT of weight REALLY fast and attributes it to good ol' fashioned diet and excercise.

-Rosie O'Donnel makes disparriaging comments on camera about Jones Reynolds regarding a possible secret gastric-bypass surgery.

-Jones Reynolds "divas" it up and tries to get the majority of her wedding expenses covered by the vendors, designers, etc so long as she drops a plug for them on air.

-ABC execs put the kaibosh on her product placements and Jones Reynolds is stuck with the bill.

-Barbara Walters announces that Jones Reynolds' nemesis, O'Donnell will be replacing Meredith Viera in the fall.

-Jones Reynolds is informed behind the scenes that her contract will not be renewed. She decides to give her notice to quit during a taping of the show.

-Jones Reynolds speaks against the show and express her grievances.

-Walters publicly reprimands Jones Reynolds behind her back.

-Jones Reynolds calls Walters a hypocrite.

Ladies, enough! I have a solution. A final word to give the winner bragging rights, a place on the View, and the all round mutual respect of viewers. A hot dog eating contest. Whoever can eat the most hot dogs in 15 minutes will be declared the least bitchiest person on the View. No, Joy Behar is not welcome to compete.