Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are hot. Really hot. I get that. She wants to help ravaged third world countries and he wants help ravaged plummeting box office sales. Both of these are noble causes, mind you. Who was that person Brad used to be married to? Oh yeah, Jennifer Aniston.
Try to follow me on this now, I'll explain it nice and clear. According to Camp Brangelina, the following are not to be accepted as truth:
- Brad Pitt cheated on his wife with Angelina Jolie while filming Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
- After a sudden "parting of ways" from his marriage with Jennifer Aniston, Brad was still seeingAngelina.
- In the months to follow, extensive media coverage and public sightings together support the rumors that Brad and Angelina were still dating.
- Angelina becomes pregnant with Brad's baby.
- Brad and Angelina travel to Africa where they stay until she delivers her baby via C-Section.
Well, I like to give people the benefit of the doubt and would in this case if not for the fact that the last two statements are verifiably true. These two facts also completely support the case that all the statements preceeding them are facts as well.
Let us not lose sight that the true sad sad story here is that of baby Shilo Nouvel Joulie-Pitt. Who, aside from facing a long acedemic future of being made fun of relentlesy, will also be forever remembered as the homewrecking icon bastard child of the media machine that is. Brangelina. Good luck, Shilo. Good luck.
No comments:
Post a Comment